A Day In The Life Of A Comfort Seeker

September 25th, 2023

The events detailed here took place on Sunday the 18th of September.

08:43

I turn in my bed as I feel myself coming awake. Even though my eyes are open, my subconscious is still running a projection of images - snippets of news, countries at war, stressful events of the past week, personal heartbreaks of the every-day. It doesn’t stop. I take it as a sign to take the day to myself, to seek an escape from all the rush. But simply anything won’t do. The Kardashians? Too dramatic. Something fantastical? Too demanding, I have no energy to learn and process intricacies of some carefully woven world filled with all this lore. I need something mind-numbing and mundane, comforting and ideally conflictless. And then it clicks. 

09:21

I sit down at breakfast with the Terrace House collection open on my laptop. The perfect remedy. I press play at the beginning of a random season. Already, the simplicity of the format brings me some comfort - six strangers (three girls and three guys), moving into a beautiful home, where they are left to live their lives and interact with each other as they please. The footage from their activities cuts back and forth to a panel of commentators, mostly famous Japanese comedians, who seem to be watching on with the viewer and discussing as they go.

The thing is that, in actuality, it’s a dating show. But it isn’t presented as one. The participants have their separate reasons for being there, whether that’s progressing their careers, trying to open up during the experience, spreading awareness of something they care about. The expectation for them to get coupled up is rarely regarded, especially in the earlier seasons, which is partly what makes it the only reality TV show that’s relatively drama-free. They go to school or work, they cook together, go out together, and try to achieve their own goals. Sometimes they go on dates with each other. And that’s pretty much it. The epitome of no plot, just vibes, but in “real” life.

You would think the routine would get old at this point, and you would be right.

13:04

After the first couple of hours, I begin to give into the rhythm. Every five meals they have, I get up for a snack. Every time they go to sleep, I take a smoke or bathroom break. Whenever a change in location occurs, I shift my position on the couch. This system I have developed provides me with additional comfort because it makes me feel as if I’m able to carry out a routine without disruptions. As if I myself lived in the Terrace House, where life is performed and the outside world hardly ever seeps in. 

17:15

You would think the routine would get old at this point, and you would be right. But there is also solace in this type of boredom. It’s not filled with anxiety, or the lingering fear of not doing enough. It's almost meditative. You drift in and out of focus, watching as the people on the screen develop particular dynamics between each other. You begin to accurately predict their reactions, although they surprise you every now and then. Someone decides to leave the house to focus on work, one couple sees no point in staying since they have found love. And someone new moves in. It doesn’t stop.

00:00

Just before going to bed, I notice that there haven’t been any new seasons of the show for a while, and I wonder why. Online, I read about how one of the contestants could no longer deal with public scrutiny after leaving the programme, and committed suicide. I read about other contestants speaking up about the network’s involvement in the show. About how they were pressured to fill certain roles and take action when they got too passive. The illusion breaks. Tomorrow I will find myself looking for an escape again, and maybe this time I’ll find one that lasts longer than a day. It might come to me in a book, a film, a show, an album… A pretty picture, a hearty meal, or even a dug-up old birthday card. But for now, I sleep, and it comes to me in dreams.